Okay, let’s try this again Greg. Let’s just sink in the sand, and relax. Those 6 people a few meters away must be thinking you are really cool to be here doing a solo trip. They must be envying you at this moment. Good job.
Hmm, what if they think you are a loser who has no friends and that’s why you are here alone on this beach?
Hmm, maybe just play with the sand a bit, let it flow through your fingers. So relaxing! They see you relax, and know you are having fun! No, this is not about them. Come on. This is your vacation Greg. You are enjoying the sand on your fingers. And you are having fun. And they can tell you are having fun.
Maybe click a selfie and post to Instagram, just so they know you are having fun? You can put in the location and hashtag, so when they search for it, they find you and know you have 96 Instagram followers. That’s pretty cool! It might even become 102 if they like what they see?
No, again. You’re getting distracted. Focus. You are having fun for you. You are cool and confident. You do not need anyone’s validation. You are cool, and you feel cool. This is exactly like that movie with Tom Cruise, where he is on the beach alone and looking cool. That’s exactly what those people think you look like Greg. You look like Tom Cruise!
God damn it, not again. Why are you so obsessed with what they think? This is your relaxation time! You have not thought about the sea ONCE in the last 5 minutes. And you fucking love the sea! It’s why you planned this trip to begin with! And here you are obsessing over some strangers’ opinions about you.
What’s important is that you have fun. Time to relax.
Breathe in.
Breathe out.
Breathe in.
Breathe out.
So serene.
You can hear the seagulls in the background.
Is there such a thing as landgulls? There must be, else seagull is just needless. Call them gulls and get it over with! Heh. That was an excellent thought. You should put that up on Twitter. Maybe those 6 will follow you on twitter and know you are pretty hilarious, and it’s totally rational for you to be having this solo trip.
God fucking damn it!
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