Give it up Steve, you will never catch me!
Hey, so I really admire this confident thing you have going. And it’s amazing to have belief in yourself. But, I have caught you 4 times so far already!
Oh yeah? Then why am I standing here, exactly 500m away from you?
Because all 4 times you begged me to let you go and stand 500m away. Look, sir, I am not trying to take you to prison. Littering is not even a crime, it is barely a misdemea —
—Let me stop you right there, Steve. You think just because you have caught me thrice —
— 4 times actua —
— Well, if they ever make a single word meaning 4 times as they did with twice and thrice, then I will be factually accurate. Until then, suck it.
Now now, there is no need for language. I have no qualms with you my frie…
…
…nd. Okay, you have got to stop running away while I am talking to you. Again, It took me literally 0.78 seconds to catch you.
Yes, but can you please let me go? Pretty pleeeeease? Just let me go this once, and stand 500m away? I swear I will behave now on.
Not this time. Fool me once, Fool me twice, Fool me thrice, Fool me… Okay, you are right, a single word for 4 times seems like a reasonable request…Quince maybe? But you won’t fool me…five times. Maybe also a single word for 5 times? Pents? We’ll have to workshop that later.
Come on man, I am not asking for much! You did so much more for much pettier criminals.
Yes, you say that like it’s counter-intuitive. But pettier the crime, more forgiving I am. It’s how it should be!
Fine, take me away. But you have not heard the last of me!
I have actually not even heard the first of you! Hi, I’m Steve. And you are?
The Nial! Formerly known as The Luded! Yes, my name has ‘the’ in it, pronounced as thee to provide gravitas. Just like a real super-villain. I expect to be taken seriously henceforth!
Sure man. Do you promise to not litter on Saturday? My niece has her birthday celebration, and my girlfriend is insistent we buy her that dollho — You don’t care. Just don’t cause trouble next Saturday, and I’ll let you off for littering this time. Savvy?
Savvy?
Savvy. Alright man, gotta go. See you next time. Don’t cause any trouble while I am away. And keep up the self-belief. This city needs more confident people like you!
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